1 more week to go for my practicum. I can’t believe that 8 weeks would pass by so quickly and without too many problems! The headache was bearable and I didn’t actually get sick. The atmosphere was great and I really enjoyed it there. I worked my butt off there and I was touched that they saw my sincerity. And so my dream came true. My search for a part-time job for December onward didn’t even begin and it felt like Christmas had already arrived at my door. They didn’t care that I was going to have a delayed graduation, or that I wasn’t the smartest in my grade. Heck, they didn’t even ask for my resume! They were impressed with the care I had for the pharmacy and now I can proudly say that I will have my first pharmacy job starting after my practicum!
Now I don’t have to worry about my parents worrying about me finding a job. I also now have a place where I feel worthwhile, a place where coworkers are caring and encouraging. And I feel so lucky. Honestly, for the jobs that I had and now will have, I have never had to search for or do interviews for. It doesn’t matter that I have to commute 3 hours round trip each time, I’m just so grateful for the opportunity, that they see the potential in me. I can’t wait to work harder than ever. And as I was thinking about why I work so hard, a phrase I’ve heard countless of times comes to mind. “Just do your personal best” says my dad. Over and over again. Personal best, there really isn’t a limit to that in my opinion. So I am willing to work harder and harder to push that limit. So that my personal best really is the best I can give.
So throughout this long windy road of pharmacy with detours and storms, I have finally gotten a chance to look out the window at the scenery I pass. Seeing the people who walk away with a smile on their face after talking to me, seeing the people who feel reassured with their questions answered, seeing the people who just needed someone to hear their story. Although its near the end of the road as I’m in my last year, I know I’ve still got a long ways to go. But now I really believe in myself and in this. That it’ll be worth it. It seems like my wish bracelet’s wish will actually come true: that me and my best friend will find the jobs that we really love.
Everyone asks the age old question some time or another, usually more than once during their lifetime. Even Garfield has asked this question in his comic! “What is the meaning of life?” What indeed is our purpose? What do we have to do so that our life is “meaningful”? The answer varies depending on our unique lives and right now, I feel as though I have figured mine out. It may change, but as of right now, my meaning of life is to create those smiling moments.
Let me explain a bit about those smiling moments. Today, I hung out with a friend for her birthday. We’ve been best friends since elementary school. We’ve had our ups and downs, but it’s always her that I would go to in my most difficult times. Our friendship’s survived time and distance going to different high schools and if this isn’t true friendship, I don’t know what is. When I got her text after we went our separate ways about how she felt today, I had a smiling moment. Knowing that I made her day better and that I had helped her in some way, I felt so content. Those smiling moments when I know of the impact I had on people. Those smiling moments when I feel as though I’ve done something worthwhile in their life that I could just die in that moment and not regret it. A good moment. I’ve had a few of these smiling moments recently and it’s what keeps me going. When I feel as though I have no place on this Earth and I’m drowning myself in my mistakes in life, one little smiling moment convinces me that I can’t just let myself go down that path. Busy and stressed with school, it’s easy to disappear into a mental war with myself. Hanging out with friends and making them smile is like opening the cloudy sky with a rainbow. There is hope. I’m not a failure. I want to keep being a light to those around me. Everyone is in a war with life; whether with themselves or people or dilemmas etc. The least I can do is to try and help bring them that rainbow and be there for them. Whenever I get a smiling moment, life just feels so “right”.
There are times to cry together, laugh together, love together. Life is one crazy drama. And like how my friends have always been there for me, it warms my heart knowing they feel the same way too. Like an overflowing bucket of love, smiling moments are worth all the time and effort put into that relationship. Nothing extravagant is free and easy in life. But neither is it impossible to feel as though the all the troubles in life was worth it. To live and strive to make those smiling moments happen makes life meaningful.